have conviction

When you marry and eventually have kids or you adopt, there is another universe that opens up. Kids bring about this change in you , make you aware of the side of you that never existed. Your entire life revolves around them. A lot of parents think of parenthood as an investment. I know some of you reading this might be taken aback by this statement, but its true to an extent. Infact a majority of the traditional Indian society has loads of expectations from their children. In some cases its unspoken but hinted, in some its thrust upon , in some its vocalised right at the time of birth. "Arree bhai, hamara ladka to engineer banega" or a girl born in the doctor's family is predestined to be a doctor. If the child decides to go against the grain then either he/she is a rebel or a loser. In most cases the poor child trods along the path charted for him, goes through endless hours of coaching classes, tuitions, counselling, somehow managing to get through the entrance tests. Even when the poor fellow doesnt make it through any decent college, parents are willing to spend lakhs in getting him through a private college just so their son becomes an engineer. Did anybody ask the poor kid what he wants to do in life.
When a child finishes his school he doesnt know what to expect in the big bad world outside the protected environment of his home and school. The subjects of biology, maths, english and geography dont tell him how to apply them in the world. Does scoring 90% in maths make him a mathematician. Does being good in maths make him a good engineer. Is that the translation ? Or does the idea of building things like machines or buildings tell him to pursue engineering. Similarly, is being good in bio translate into him pursuing medicine or is there an innate need in the person to save human lives and reduce pain and suffering.
Parents need to counsel their children on what they want to do in life, what is their passion and help them discover it. Today's world has opened up in so many ways, there are so many avenues. music, literature, theatre, DJing, painting, photography, food, bartending...
Our schooling system rounds up our personality and makes us ready in a way to cross the threshold, but it is very important to realise our passion.
I see 90% of people around me doing things they are not passionate about. They simply do it because its the safe way to be. A monthly wage packet which takes care of their family, pays their EMI's and funds their vacation. Does it require guts to go on the path less travelled. Will the world collapse if you are not married by 27, have kids by 29 and own a home by 30. And this can only be achieved if you go the safe way.
Going the safe way does give you all of the above, but the nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach which haunts you every 3-4 months and tells you "is this really what i want to do in life?".... how do you handle that. Is it brushed away as a whim or a fantasy, truly swept under the carpet, when the next EMI comes along ??
Give your child the courage and conviction to do what he enjoys the rest will follow, yes its a tough choice full of ambiguity, but the world is more accepting now, and our uncles and aunties are more understanding...... after all isnt that what we are most concerned about ?!